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Poster: Purple Gel Date: May 19, 2009 8:27am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Morning yuk!! .... Non-Dead

Here's a particular favorite of mine... I tell it with an Italian family, not to be politically incorrect, but because it was told to me that way and it just seems to sound funnier when you use an exaggerated Italian accent. It's a little long, but the payoff is funny.

So...
Little Vito and his parents are at the zoo sitting in front of the elephant display. Papa goes off to get a beer.

Vito: "Mama, whats-a dat-a big-a ting a-hangin off da elephant?'

Mama: "Vito, you know what dat is, its-a da tunk"

Vito: "no-no Mama, The ting-a Hangin' off-a da udder side"

Mama: 'Come On, Vito, You know dats-a da tail"

Vito: " No, Mama, the big-a Tick-a Ting in-a da middle... Whats-a Dat?'

Mama (Blushing): "Oh Vito, Dats-a Nothing!!"

Papa returns, and Mama goes to the restroom.

Vito: "Papa, whats-a dat-a big-a ting a-hangin off da elephant?'

pppa: Vito, baby, You're a big-a boy, you know dats-a da trunk."

Vito: no-no Papa, The ting-a Hangin' off-a da udder side"

Papa: Vito, you're-a- in-a what, first-a grade? You know dats-a da Tail"

Vito (getting frustrated); " No, Papa, the big-a Tick-a Ting in da middle... Whats-a Dat?"

Papa: "Oh dat...Vito, Dats-a da Penis"

Vito: But Mama said it was-a nothin'"

Papa (puffing up with pride and hitching his pants up): Ah, your Mama... She's just-a Spoiled"